Now Ears a Big Ol' Problem

Turns out I've got an ear infection from all that swimming in Dubai. How lovely. So now I've been perscribed with eardrops which cause me to spasm from the tickly sensation everytime the green liquid whizzes down my ear canal. Now I can't lean on that ear when I'm trying to get to sleep either as the liquid would drip out, which cuts my potential sleeping positions by about 50%.

Home [ Dubai - Day 10/11 ]

5:15 am and I'm sat at the airport waiting to go home. I hate waiting around like this!

Well I'm back in England now. I hate returning because my mind always wanders to, "hhhmmmm, I wonder what we'd be doing now if we were still on holiday?" Amazingly, I did manage to keep my promise of daily holiday blogs!

The Last Supper [ Dubai - Day 9 ]

Well that's the penultimate day out of the way. Have to wake up at 3am tomorrow to give us enough time to catch the plane and head back to England.

Got my results today. Average at best, but not too bad. Went jellyfish hunting again today but found nothing interesting except this weird brown blobby thing about 3cm long hiding under the kiyaks. Not sure what it was. (and no; it wasn't a terd.) Also managed to see a crab by the swimming pool under the bridge that leads into the restaurant. It was chewing on some weedy stuff. Not sure what the little rascal was hoping to gain from chomping on algi but if I was a crab I'd probably just nibble stuff to combat the boredom too. Poor fella has to walk sideways everywhere. Must get tedious. I can't think of any good reason why god would programme them to do that, unless he was just having a laugh or an 'off-day'.

Jellyfish Shoulders [ Dubai - Day 9 ]

Went kiyaking again today and managed to balance a jellyfish on my oar and giggle like a schoolgirl at my accomplishment. It was cool being that close to a jellyfish that wasn't dead. If god had given those squishy little guys hands and fingers this one would certainly have stuck the middle finger in my direction.

I get my AS level college results tomorrow via E-Mail, so that will be a nice depressing end to the holiday. If I don't do as well as I'd hoped I'll just have to make sure I nail the next set of tests. If I do rubbish I'm sure my jellyfish friends will comfort me with a shoulder (Do Jellyfish have shoulders!?) to cry on. Tomorrow is our last full day because we fly home the day after. I'm off to bed now. Toodle pips.

Waterpark [ Dubai - Day 8 ]

Went to a waterpark called Wild Wadi today. It was a really impressive waterpark, actually. The lifeguards seemed to be doing anything but guarding lives though. Popular past-times for the staff included splashing British people with water, making fun of accents, and tickling people. I thought it was a nice touch.

Cities and Confetti [ Dubai - Day 7 ]

As expected I sucked camel testies at Skiing although the trip into Dubai was really interesting. Got to see the 7 star hotel which looked very nice. We're going to the waterpark next to it tomorrow so it's another early start for us. I'm going to hazard a guess and say that the waterpark isn't 7 star, though.

Before we could reach Ski Dubai, we had to navigate a moving traffic cone.

Today as we were leaving Ski Dubai through the area where the front desks are we heard a loud band. At first I assumed the loud noise was made by a skier hitting the class window of the viewing area, but it turned out the noise was caused by a confetti gun. It was used because the 3 millionth customer had just bought a ticket to the slopes for him and his family.

Lots of staff surrounded the guy and his kids. They gave him some plane tickets (no idea where to) and a massive green cake. As all the confetti fell to the ground I looked over to the cleaner and saw that he looked really pissed off. As he began the clean up process kids were picking up the confetti and throwing it again.

'Paper Bag Fish' [ Dubai - Day 6 ]

Need to wake up at 7am tomorrow because we're going to Ski Dubai, which is basically a ski dome in the middle of the desert. Dubai city centre to be precise. Surreal but cool, me thinks. Imagine the Eden Project in England but with less rare cacti and more snow. It should be fun to look around the place. Shame I can't ski.

Finally saw a jellyfish whilst kiyaking today. It was light blue and looked like a paper bag with veins running through it. Apparently the light blue ones are harmless, but I still felt like a hardcore daredevil poking it with my ore. Unfortunately it wobbled away after a good prodding. Most nimble paper bag I've ever seen. Had some chicken nuggets this evening and have felt ill ever since. Something tells me that wasn't chicken nestled in those crispy skins.

Flying Fish and Sun Tans [ Dubai - Day 5 ]

Spent today relaxing around the hotel. We've got into a rhythm now, with breakfast around 9, Pool until 4 or 5 and restaurant hunting shortly after. Went kiyaking around the lagoon again today as it's free and nobody apart from us shares our passion for burning under the sun on a 1-person boat whilst looking for jellyfish.

While we were out in the lagoon a fish jumped over and around the kiyaks. It was only about an inch long but it still caught me by surprise. This fish seemed to be the leader of the fish world because seconds later I was in the centre of a fish rave. There were about 30 fish jumping around me. I felt like the god of the sea being treated to a dance from my fishy slaves even though in reality I remained a skinny kid from England with a patchy tan. Sadly my dear friend the Blobfish was no-where to be seen.

Desert Escapades [ Dubai - Day 4 ]

Today was the best day so far by a long old shot. Hung around the pool as normal but then we were picked up from the front of the hotel by a very nice fella who whisked us off to the dunes. The thing that got me pondering was why we ended up travelling 2 hours to find good dunes when we were in the country of Dubai which is essentially completely dune-covered give or take the odd hotel and camel farm.

This was what we were being driven around in across the dunes. Thank god it was a 4x4. Driving across sandy hills in a Jaguar wouldn't be too soothing.

We shared a car with some German ladies who were 'sehr nett'. So we get to these dunes where our driver lets down the tyres to give added grip on the sand and then takes us up and down the dunes pretty darn fast in a car reassuringly fitted with a roll-cage. The trip across the dunes lasted about an hour or so and in that time there were stops for photos and lunch. After this we pulled up at this place in the middle of the desert which was surrounded by a mixture of camels, quad bikes, and tourists. I'd never ridden a camel before as they're hard to come by in England, so I gave it a nice little straddle and had a ride. I think my camel had Tourettes as it wouldn't shut up. Either that or it had the hump.

After that was eating, belly dancing, drinking, bartering for cheap watches and trying on Pandoras. Not all at the same time, though. That would be stupid. And so that was day 4 in a nutshell. Twas a good day. Could talk about it for ages and start to get boring. Too late.

Convicts [ Dubai - Day 3 ]

More lazing around the pool today. Nice and relaxing. Hired a Jet-Ski for 20 minutes, which was a long enough time scale in which to work out that Jet-Skiing is harder than it looks and narrowly miss hitting a boat of tourists shortly after.

We took these Jet-Skis out for 20 minutes, in which time my eyes almost died from salt water splashback

This evening has been rather exciting, though. My dad was told he was not allowed to wear sandals into the restaurant, and naturally an awkward dinner followed, with the silence being broken with an occasional, "Look at that guy. He's wearing sandals and they let him in!?" Anyhoozle, after the meal we decided to buy some food from the nearby market. As we walked back into the hotel with our bags of shopping 2 guards ran up to us in the lobby like we were some kind of bargain terrorists (The prices at the hotel were insanely high so we had attempted to buy water elsewhere this time) and were told we weren't allowed to do this. We decided we didn't care for this rule and sulkily took our contraband upstairs. Now I feel like I should be sleeping with a gun under my pillow. Leaving this hotel is going to be like escaping Alcatraz now.

Wi-Fi [Dubai - Day 2]

The hotel that I'm staying in only has free Wi-Fi in the lobby, so I have to be there to post to Blogspot. Ah, the lobby. There's lots (and lots) of hotel staff walking around and smiling in a sinister way. They basically see to your every need, which is nice. [keep it clean] I like the lobby, because there's always something going on, be it people playing guitar for the tourists, or new arrivals running in with their jeans on, fresh off the plane shouting, "bloody 'ell, it's well hot out there!" I would know because I was one of those people the other day.

Side note - This lobby became known as 'The Jobby Lobby', because most of the time people from our party only came down to use the loo.

By the Pool [Dubai - Day 2]

Holy mother of god, it's hot. Really hot. The kind of hot you would imagine feeling whilst laid down on the surface of the sun, legs akimbo, with a Luke warm glass of water to keep you 'cool' (Which it wouldn't) I don't even like water (on it's own. if I didn't like water full-stop I'd most likely be extremely parched, as well as extremely dead) although in Dubai I'm drinking loads of it.

Went Kiyaking in the lagoon next to the hotel, which was nice. Plan to go Jet-skiing in the future. Forgot to mention that we saw a crab yesterday on the beach. It was definitely the fastest and most agile crab I'd ever seen. Gone in seconds. Apparently when a crab's drunk it walks in a straight line. Unfortunately I have no evidence to back this up.

This is the pool we spent many-a-day beside. Lots of frolicking went on in that water.

Donkey Attack [Dubai - Day 1]

Just arrived at the hotel we'll be staying at for the next 9 days. Our driver who drove us from the airport to the hotel almost hit a donkey that ran across the road. You don't get that happening everyday in England now, do you? You'd be more likely to hit a hooded criminal than an animal. I'm liking Dubai alot. It's different.

Plane Journey [Dubai - Day 1]

Well that was fun. Remember when I specifically said that my worst nightmare would be to be sat behind a selfish person who reclines their seat all the way? Well it happened. Now I'm walking around the hotel with 5 hours to spare until we're allowed in our rooms looking like a zombie. Chin up Tom, chin up.

The Airport [Dubai - Day 1]

This evening we fly to Dubai from Heathrow. The thing that Frustrates me about the airport is that you can never understand what the man or woman over the tannoy is saying. It's like they're speaking through a row of sponges.

I suppose the next time I blog I'll either be at the airport or on the plane. I hope I'm not sat behind one of those really annoying people who recline their seats all the way back. Usually if that happens I give them a nice friendly (subtle but just noticeable) kick in the seat to warn them off. Anyhoozle, goodbye Blogspot! For now.

Click on 'Newer Post' to read about the next day in Dubai

Make a Wish

I'd like to punch slow-walking people in the back of the head whilst I'm in a crowded shopping centre, please. Do I have your permission?