Visitor Review - Tim Cade

Many thanks to Time Cade for his delightful take on The Morgan Chronicles:

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It is not often that one becomes so bored that they consider brutal mutilation of oneself with a small and very blunt pencil, which would be rammed constantly against ones own temple until it, or your skull cracks and your last hours of misery end with you slumped over the computer – the eternal bark produced by your machine as you head rests against the keys as it plays you off into the dark valleys.

That however is what the unwitting Internet surfer is faced with when exploring the endless amounts of blogs that confront them in World Wide Web. Bloggers; a race confined to soiled chairs , where their chubby fingers, wallowed in the stench of grease and fat stumble aimlessly, like the eternal drunk across their keyboard in an irremediable attempt at constructing a sentence worth any perception.

The Morgan Chronicles is such a blog. The writer, or should I say the conductor of this shambolic keyboard march is the impetuous Tom Morgan. A member of the imbecilic masses he adopts a moronic stance on topical news, raping it of its value and repackaging it as material so senseless it is laughable.

Take a recent ‘news story’, one which reflects the utter insensateness and pathetic perspicacity the conductor has on current affairs. An article written at 13:41 on May 7th illustrates brilliantly the author’s stupidity in even his own affairs. “Unfortunately, I haven't been able to vote because my voting slip wasn't posted to me” was a quote from such article. I offer my complete condolences, providing his mind can swallow such a word because supposedly not being able to exercise his right to vote is a sad thing. I will also go as far to say that I ‘recognise’ a statement at the end of one paragraph “I think the problem with the voting system is that too many people make uninformed decisions” to be one of validity. Yes Tom, too few people do understand the voting system and make uniformed decisions, one of them being yourself. It is no requirement that you bring your poll card to the polling station it just speeds up the process. As long as you applied and are recognised on the list then you can vote – no need for a polling card. As you brilliantly put it : "Point proven, I think"

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Remember, if you want to submit a chronicles review simply send it to me via E-mail at sharkbait92@hotmail.com - Remember, the reviews submitted have to be negative and humorous. Get writing, folks!