I wouldn’t know how to describe the Morgan Chronicles if you asked me,
Upon trying to access the blog from college, I was greeted by a notification that it has been blocked for “antisemetic content.” Perhaps I should have taken this as a warning of what was it come, but no, foolishly I continued undeterred in my attempt to gain access. Once free from the iron grip of Internet censors, I returned, and was finally able to view the forbidden content which lies within.
As a writer, Mr Morgan exudes an overwhelming sense of immaturity, barely being able to transcribe a single rational sentence before falling back into his well-practiced retinue of bad jokes and poorly attempted sarcasm. Despite this apparent lack of direction, demarcations between the focus of particular entries have been created, namely between the “News Page” and “Game Reviews.” From my analysis, the “News Page” leaves much to be desired; it consists almost entirely of plagiarised news segments from the Metro. Any original content which does accidentally find its way in is almost invariably written in a tone appropriate for a child who had only recently learnt how to read. The reader is patronised repeatedly by the way in which Mr Morgan writes as if to indicate that he is speaking to an audience, a lie which is made so painfully obvious by the fact that almost every article has not a single comment or ratings, and indeed, the total number of page-views for the entire blog barely exceeds the total number of articles which have been published.
If you thought the “Game Reviews” section was going to be an improvement, then you have been sadly mistaken. This section merely serves as a deceptive attempt to direct more page views to the blog, as evidence by the comments from a young Yugoslavian boy who left a comment reading “What? This isn’t IGN!” Indeed, from statistical data I have retrieved, the Yugoslavian boy seems to be the only regular visitor to the blog at all, whether this is due to his own will or a technical glitch is point of considerable debate. A ‘bounce rate’ of over 50% is yet more evidence that I am not alone in my desire to leave this blog almost immediately after the page loads - the revulsion one experiences is not unlike how it feels to listen to Nick Clegg talking about the benefits of a multicultural society.
To conclude, with absolutely no redeeming factors, this blog is an abject failure. Do not under any circumstance ruin your low blood pressure by attempting to wade through the ineptitude which seeps out of Mr Morgan’s keyboard. This blog is going nowhere.
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Remember, if you want to submit a chronicles review simply send it to me via E-mail at sharkbait92@hotmail.com - Remember, the reviews submitted have to be negative and humorous. Get writing, folks!
